Hi everybody, it’s Jasmyne with Relate Family Therapy. What do you do when something scares you? Or when you get really angry? Or when you feel like you’re just going to freak out? What is the first thing that you think? That initial thought that you have dictates something about you. There are times in life where we have a sense of overwhelm or fear, or something comes up for us that is just so big we stop in our tracks. What is the first thing that you think when that happens? If you look back on the big events in your life you’ll see a pattern in the way that you think. You’ll see a pattern in how you respond to events. Some people immediately shut down. They don’t know what to do. They don’t know where to go. They feel they’re stressed, and they want to run and avoid. Some people think it’s all their fault. They catastrophize, and they personalize. They put in on themselves in a way that doesn’t feel good to them or to anybody else around them. Some people victimize. They sense that they are the only ones that have ever been through this. They sense that no one will ever understand what’s happening for them, and they feel like they’re in a position that no one will ever be able to help. When you first recognize your initial instinct when you feel extreme emotions, you can put yourself in a position of power. You can take back that initial response and say, “This is a habitual thing for me. When something goes wrong or something is hard, this is what I immediately think.” If you’re able to shift that and move into a more positive place where you can say, “That’s not how I’m going to do it anymore,” you’re going to find greater success. Taking that initial piece out and putting something new in can change the way that you move through life. It’s a strong form of adaptation. It’s something that a lot of people don’t master, but if you’re able to, you’ll see success.
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